By Simon Gonzalez
A guide to the cultural phenomenon known as the Super Bowl
Are you watching the big game on Sunday? Of course you are.
The home state team is playing in the Super Bowl. The experts say the Carolina Panthers have been the best squad in the league this season and are the favorites to win.
Admit it, though. The presence of a North Carolina team is pretty nifty for Super Bowl 50, but it’s merely a bonus, a cherry on top of the Sunday spectacular.
Sure, a rooting interest is nice. But we don’t watch the game because of who is playing. We watch because it’s The Thing to Do.
Football itself is somewhat of an oddity. If we’re honest, it’s a pretty boring sport. It takes well over three hours to play a game that’s officially 60 minutes long. The actual time the ball is in play? Want to guess? How about 11 minutes, according to a study done in 2010 by the Wall Street Journal. The average play takes four seconds.
There’s an awful lot of falling down, getting back up, and standing around while deciding what to do next. And people disdain soccer — you know, a sport where the ball is always in motion — for being dull.
Yet we watch, in record numbers. Football long ago passed baseball as America’s most popular sport (I blame George Carlin for his football vs. baseball monologue). We’re somehow fascinated by these fast, overly padded behemoths. We put up with the tedium of 2-yard runs and incomplete passes for the thrill of the big plays and the big hits.
As popular as football is at any time, it’s nothing compared to the cultural phenomenon known as the Super Bowl.
We don’t question the antiquated, hyperbolic name — “Golly, it’d be super if my team won!” Fun fact: “Super Bowl” was a term facetiously coined by Lamar Hunt, whose Kansas City Chiefs played in the inaugural contest. In a letter to NFL commissioner Pete Rozelle, Hunt said, “I have kiddingly called it the ‘Super Bowl,’ which obviously can be improved upon.”
We watch by the tens of millions. Last year’s game was seen by at least 114.4 million viewers in the United States, making it the most-watched television broadcast ever. Super Bowls occupy nine of the top 10 spots on the list of highest-rated shows.
We watch in groups. Super Bowl parties have become the social event of the season. Super Bowl Sunday is the second-largest food consumption day of the year, behind only Thanksgiving. There’s no turkey and stuffing in sight. Instead, we consume chicken wings — some 1.2 billion of them — along with 4,000 tons of popcorn, 8 million pounds of guacamole with 14,500 tons of chips, 4 million pizzas, and 2.5 million pounds of nuts. No word on how many millions of antacids are downed in the aftermath.
The gatherings are not just for football fans. For lots of us, the game is secondary. It’s the commercials that matter!
Super Bowl ads are a marvel unto themselves, as much a water cooler topic as the actual contest. Forget going to the bathroom during a break in the action. The commercials have become must-see TV. There are shows dedicated to them, rating the best and the worst. There are national surveys that gauge viewer response.
The prices reflect the popularity. A 30-second Super Bowl ad is selling for as much as $5 million. That’s up considerably from the $37,500 for Super Bowl I.
These days, no Super Bowl would be complete without a spectacular halftime show.
Back when the focus was the actual game on the field, the halftime show usually featured college marching bands — although Super Bowl I did feature the great trumpeter Al Hirt, along with the University of Arizona and Grambling State bands. The wholesome ensemble group Up With People performed four times in the early years. If you’ve never heard of Up With People, do yourself a favor and stay away from Google. You’ve been warned!
The entertainment quotient increased with pop stars like New Kids on the Block and Gloria Estefan. The ante was considerably upped in 1993, when Michael Jackson performed. The show then had to be bigger and better each year, up until, ironically, the moment when Michael’s sister, Janet, introduced the phrase “wardrobe malfunction” to the cultural lexicon.
Following the understandable backlash, NFL honchos wisely decided to eschew the shock value for the next few years and played it safe with legendary old codgers like Paul McCartney, the Rolling Stones, Tom Petty, Bruce Springsteen and The Who. This year’s headliner, Coldplay, continues a recent trend of relatively modern groups unlikely to invite controversy.
So enjoy the party, enjoy the game, enjoy the commercials, enjoy the halftime show, and go Panthers! And just to keep it all in perspective, remember the immortal words of Dallas Cowboys running back Duane Thomas who, when asked before No. VI whether the Super Bowl was the ultimate game, replied, “If it’s the ultimate game, how come they’re playing it again next year?”
